excerpts from a conversation w/ superman.....

me.
hey, so i understand you have heat vision?

superman.
yes, that's true

me.
i'm also under the understanding that you are very strong, you enjoy flying and that you also have x-ray vision is this true?

superman.
umm...yes.

me.
did you ever use your heat vision to cook popcorn, jump start a P.T. Crusier or make womens clothes fall off?
have you ever had a SUPER BONER?

...........awkward silence.....

me.
excuse me...did you maybe not like that question? did it make you feel SUPER uncomfortable?
sorry you SUPER ASSHOLE.